Leaving the house at 11:15. It is 62 degrees outside and sunny with light hazy clouds overhead muting the light. Today very much feels like fall reminding us that Winter is not very far ahead. Something about the light.

From the parking lot at the Strand, the water looks smooth. I head down the stairs and it feels quiet despite the sound of leaf blowers in the distance. While it’s only 11:30, it feels like 4:30. The sun casts a white glow over the pale blue water.

Once I’m on the beach, it looks like the surf has picked up again. It’s not as big as it was on Friday but there is proper surf in the water for sure. The water feels the same on my feet as it has the last few swims. I set my backpack down on the rocks next to an abandoned wetsuit that has been lying here for the past several days.

I head out into the water and wait for a break between sets. By the time that happens I am well past wet. Another wave is coming and I run forward so I can dive into it just before it breaks. Then I keep swimming and glide over the crests of the next couple waves in the set.

The water is definitely in the 50’s but I feel good. No headache. I try to take stock of every sensation pulsing through my body. Before just about every swim in these temperatures, I spend a good deal of time ruminating over the forthcoming cold. I anticipate it with varying degrees of dread. Essentially what I am dreading is this exact moment that I am in right now. The moments just after full emersion. I imagine how terrible it will be. Well, here I am now. I ask myself, “Is it so terrible?” I have to say no. I am by no means what I would call “comfortable,” but I feel beyond alive and I am so happy to be here.

I swim south and gradually adjust to the cold. I am trying to maintain the gap between me and the waves and keep pointing myself westward. I swim past a pack of surfers at the main reef break, then a smaller pack just in front of the middle stairs. Once I near the headlands, the waves start breaking further out and I need to sharpen my westward tilt. There are several surfers here too and it looks like this is where the larger waves are today.

I am about 50 feet west of the big rock. I watch the waves move past me as gentle slopes and then increase in steepness before breaking on that big rock. I can see waves in various stages of building and breaking all the way down the beach as I look north. There are several groups of birds flying towards me from way up north - a mix of pelicans and gulls. I see the Ritz in the distance and it looks small over a tiny lifeguard tower. Everything in front of me looks rugged and light blue and misty grey.

I swim north now. I try to lose my mind and sense of identity in the water and cold. I feel kind of perfect and like I am riding on the edge of that place where cold and warm meet. One moment I lean warm and the next I lean cold. It is definitely colder than Sunday. Both Friday and Sunday seem like strange anomalies filled with unnaturally warm patches. It is warmer than Saturday morning though, which isn’t saying much.

I don’t stop at all between the south and north ends of the swim. I feel driven to just keep moving forward. I pass over kelp tree after kelp tree. I try to focus on the electric charge that covers all of my skin. In my imagination I peel away my skin to let the water into every hidden part of me. I feel like only good things could come of that.

I’m at the north end now and ready to turn around for the final push home. It feels so late out here even though it is not even 1:00 yet. I get closer and closer to shore as I head towards the asphalt road. At one point I roll over the crest of a building wave just as a pelican is doing the same right above me. So close. That feels like a special moment.

Soon I head directly to shore and try to speed things up so I’m not stuck in an outside set of waves. I get to about thigh deep water when a set actually does come in. I get upright but not on my feet and a large volume of water breaks on me and rolls me hard onto the sandy bottom. I definitely felt that. I walk back to retrieve my pack and head up the stairs in the autumn light. It’s all so good.